morning blues...

everytime i woke up, i felt frustrated..
i enjoyed my dreams so much that when i woke up.. aww man.. im back to this reality world..
my routine these days were wake up.work.finish up journals.sleep.dream~!
its so lifeless..
waking up each day with no purpose in life..
where were those days have been?
will those days come back?

were ever a good listener? yes? think twice

In the actual world.. not many good listeners exist
it is cause nobody cares of others but to "I, me and myself"

I should be studying abit for my practical exam but I felt kinda malas n no mood..
what am I gonna do?
practice the x-mas carolling songs~!!
yah... Its surprising that I joined.. but for fun la.. it was FUN
I have problem remembering the lyrics.. sigh ...
anyway I'll try my BEST~!! ;)

I watched a movie just now which called StepBrothers. I story kinda stupid n funny but I like the moral of the story : be who you are although ppl does not accept the way your are.
i think someday ppl will acknowledge us.

why things kept on happening on me.. I did nothing but I become the innocent victim..
is this a test or punishment from above?
virus also my fault
thumbdrive also my fault
being who i am also my fault
being someones dear also my fault
spoon n fork kept in cupboard n went missing also my fault
get scolding also my fault
worrying also my fault
what else u all wanna blame on me??
I just don't understand why these things happens..

Everyone changes as times goes by.. either for the better or the worse..
most think they r matured but they aren't
most think they became confident but more to egoism
most think they care bout others by sending forwarded messages but actually they remember to care
most think they r pretty n handsome but memang they r getting more gorgeous =)

actually i donno how to put it into words.. i feeling slightly drowsy due to sinus problem again

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Oh well.. Practical exam coming soon n End of semester exam again.. then it will be a annual dinner... i donno what to wear ,, how nice if im a guy then i wouldn't need to think so much.. this month so many ppl's b;day.. crap la.. headache with thinking of what presents to buy.. somemore x-mas coming soon.. >_< I think i'll delay the presents till next month..

Handphone - back to normal

finally my antique handphone able to ring!! yay!! no need to buy new phone!!
I think my handphone trying to show warning signs that it will say bye bye to me soon.. =/
the button for no.1 already loose and always drops off... =p

My handphone spoilt... >_<

Last 2 days I dropped twice and last night I accidentally dropped it once.. a real hard 1 ...
The most of the functions are still normal just that it can't ring but can vibrate.. similiar to setting my handphone to silent mode.. *sob sob*

Must study !!!

I dont have the mood to study these days.. too many visits to other hospitals which drains off my energy.. by the time i reach back about 4.30pm.. i'll be dead tried.. another 2 more visits on mon n tues.. the next day i'll have my exams.. >_<
thank god there were study group for 2 days which stimulates me a lil to study .. hehee..
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The melamine thinggy never ends.. The other time was the Rabbit milk candy.. this time is bout the biscuits that our cafetaria provides us.. i've been taking it for 2yrs n now only they found out it contain melamines... the funniest part that i heard was when some ppl here heard bout the biscuit news, they immediately went to the toiletbowl to vomit it out,, crap la..

FINALLY I finished watching West Side Story~!! woohoo
why am I so happy? I would proudly tell u that I took 3 days to finish a 2 hour 30mins movie!
I was kinda curious why most ppl said the movie were great.. within every scene I'll stop because I just couldn't stand their songs but I love to see them dance. The choreography were SUBARASHI~!! The storyline kinda normal but its kinda meaningful.. hehehee~
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Wow.. I'll be having theory for almost 2 months...crazy la.. I can imagine how stressful I'll be especially for the practical exam. Next 2 weeks I'll be having Test II.. n I havent study a single thing.. heheheeeeeee,,, good for me!!

Short but FUN

I had a trip to terengganu.. it was fun although it was just 2 days trip. =)

First time I went to Tasik Kenyir and Empangan Kenyir.. the place is so peaceful n beautiful.

My fav candy contain MELAMINE!!

I've been eating this Milk Rabbit candies for over 22 years of my life n now only they've discovered that it contains MELAMINE. o.O I'm still ALIVE!
I'm still having few biji of those candies in my drawer.

feeling down again

I hate to do assignments in BM coz I donno how to translate Eng to BM .. finally I know how bad my BM was.. darn

now I'm stuck with my assignment with lotsa harted feelings. Night shift is coming again! with all these night shift how am i going to achieve my procedures ... damn it

that day i was happily eating papaya n mango then my fren saw me in da corridor n she said " why r u eating this type of things ar? " i was kinda piss because the last time she said i always get sick cos didnt take fruits. Now, I'm eating fruits is it a crime ar?? always think before questioning something that contraindicated from what u said to me the last time.. Just let me eat what i wan n PAPAYA & MANGO is healthy for goodness sake.

So lazy to blog nowadays..
Last week psychiatric posting weren't that bad compared to this week posted to day surgery unit. Oh well.. can't complain much.. still got 3 days more to go.
Last Sun I had fun doing volunteery work in zoo.. i thought i was gonna assigned to clean animal poops but I was assigned to follow the vet to bathe a Sumatran Tiger. Well.. i didnt get to really bathe them but I had the chance to wipe dry the tiger after bathe. I wish i could hug the tiger.. XD

Bad morning

Tutor came in late.. it is fine.. then she spent so much time on saying that we don't proper group work n so on.. yes we all do know but nothing can be done.. she puts on VERY HIGH EXPECTATIONS.. crap la.. she expect us to study 5hours a day.. It would be no problem for nerds la.. or unless near exam.. crap la.. our assignment were like mountain high n want us do to everything perfect n also wants us to study 5 HOURS per day.. i need a life of my own,, crap la. this is way too much.. anyway she was just suggesting that we should do so... then only she begins to teach.. my mood totally spoilt till i didnt realize i release it on the person sitting next to me.. feel bad now..

What had happened last week ??

1) Whole entire class get extreme scoldings from tutors! Because of :
- A stupidity of a girl listening to songs while sitting right infront of the door. The tutor saw n get so damn mad n started scolding the whole class for the entire day. >_< the girl still tak insaf-insaf lagi. WTF la..
- Group members can't cooperate well in doing presentations.. then all of us kena nag like mad

2) My classmates r disrespectful n they don't deserve it either. Same goes to my roommate.

3) Down with major flu for 3days then upper respiratory infection till now.. I get the flu from my dad when i came back on last weekend.

4) Drama marathon !! woohoo!! Anime marathon!! General Marion in D.Gray-man damn kakkoi!!!

5) I watched 3D movie with a whole bunch of friends in MV.. =)

6) I haven't start my case study at all ! yay! Good improvement! =P

SAVE SAVE SAVE

Have to save lotsa money this month.. got many expensive things to buy next month... >_<

Its 12.30am now.. I should be sleeping~

I was browsing through the pics of friends went for clubbings, dinners n convocation.. these occasions seems kinda fun.. for clubbing n dinner, the girls get to dress up really sexy n hot n elegant.,, too bad i'm on this career line that i won't have all these type of opportunity to actually dress up coz there wont be any special dinners n so on.
I was wondering when will be my convocation.,. it will be very very long time more ( > 1 yr ).. >_< I shouldn't be thinking bout this now.. i don't even know if i can graduate or not. pray hard!! Our convocation here we gonna wear our uniform.. no special hat or special robes.. cis.. tak gaya at all .. I doubt my dearest family members n friends wouldn't attend anyway.. hmm.. i think i shouldn't look forward to it at all ..

Should I go back to college now? I'm suppose to follow up a case.. but i felt damn lazy to go back there now since I'm going back there tonight.. I have the feeling the patient will discharge this evening.. Arghhhhh!!!!!!!! I'm sick of doing all this case studies.. total waste of time..

I donno how am I gonna survive for another 4 days posted in labour ward.. Most of the staffs here don't teach us much things compare to staffs in operation theater. They r not friendly at all.. If u wan to achieve something, u must treat them damn nice.. my fren actually used up her allowance to belanja the staffs there so that the staffs will treat her well n she was able to achieve her log book easily,, some staffs very berat sebelah,, they also treat pretty students much much more better.. wtf ..

I'm not happy with my roster for next week! How can Sister put me together with the either 1 of the most annoying girl in the same shift for the whole entire week???! I hope these ppl don't cause me any trouble or scolding for their mistakes.. They had caused me extreme irritations for the past few weeks! I can't take it anymore! still got another 2 weeks of work with them.. haihz...
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I was browsing through the pictures,, I saw some of my secondary sch frens pics.. they look so damn different!! I could barely recognize them.. most of them looks so pretty.. everyone had changed so drastically except me ... ehhehe,,, i'm still stuck with da old look..

nursery

It was so great.. I was able to bath babies~! I even gave a baby his FIRST BATH!! Currently i'm posted to Nursery.. babies all very ugly n naughty ( its a taboo to say the baby is pretty or cute here ). Most babies their faces r almost da same, it was kinda tough to recognise them.. Some mother that request bottle feeds for the baby.. then only we have the opportunity to feed the babies.. its really a good experience.. when u work here u'll feel like having a baby of your own, but when u work in labour room, u'll felt like u don't wanna give birth at all .. that was what most of my frenz told me..

Darn.. I thought i would have off day on Sun ... then at least i can rest my legs.. too bad for me.. I have to get up early to work

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So many things in life i didn't have the chance to experience.. all because of this stupid college that i am in.. oh well.. just another 1 year more to go.. then i'll be free.. actually they keep us like a prison also good.. we don't spend to much money ;) but we'll go nuts very soon..

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today i stayed home~! i'm such a good girl. my grandma bebel-bebel the whole day, i wonder when will i get immune of it.. *sigh*

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geramnya.. i purposely requested offday n it is totally wasted.. thought of going MV the whole entire day.. >_< oh well.. just forget bout it..

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Genting trip was fun.. I kinda dislike casino.. so busuk..
Planned to go to outdoor theme park but failed.. >_< thanks to da heavy rain..

1 week of annual leave aren't enough for me.. >_<

past few days i went genting. i didnt get to play at outdoor theme park coz of heavy rain.. crap la.. anywayz i manage to enter casino.. hehe.. its so damn noisy n smokey inside there.. i left that place with a big headache due to the smoke..

Yay~!! HOLIDAY!!!

I'm free for this week till Sat~! woohoo~!! felt like i just escaped from prison.. =D

On Mondayz i gonna collect my semIV results... i think i need to standby rm50 for resit my Endocrine System exam paper. Pray hard that I pass all my exam!!!

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For the past 1 month i was posted to Paediatric Ward for 2 weeks n Operation Theater (OT) for 2 weeks ~
Working in children's ward isn't that bad, some of them just so kawaii n some of them very very manja n naughty.. I stood just 1 metre away n they started to cry.. >_< I haven't even touch them !! I did a baby bath for a 4days old baby.. thank god CN Mary was kind enough to guide me.. =)
I think i might consider to work in OT after i graduate.., its so fun n challenging .. just that nurses job kinda "mafan" which u have to prepare so many equipments n instruments n have to count n rinse after use before sending for sterilization. The first day i went into OT, its so freaking cold in there. I dont know i'm qualified or capable enough to work there in future..

everthing in life are special..
if only u appreciates it.

What's wrong with my chatterbox? Always shows bad ID.. cacated la...

I felt like going on holiday.. maybe this time I should go by myself since nobody can teman. Where should i go?? hmm... maybe somewhere i won't meet anyone that i know.. or should i visit my friends in overseas? hehehe...

I'm too lazy to blog nowadays.. hehee.. so bare with me

"Good News"

My grandma will be staying here permanently with my family. I should really pity my stepmom coz she have to take care of my grandma. Whenever I come home, she will grab the opportunity to fly away then I have to take over her shift. It's not to say I don't like my grandma or whatever it is.. there were a few episodes that makes me felt extremely dissappointed therefore it makes me not so fond of my grandma anymore. Anyway, she is still my grandma.
I really hope my other aunts n uncles will also take the responsibility to take care of her. Next year would be our first year celebrate CNY in KL.,, Good for me.. I can keep my annual leaves for other days n work during CNY coz my house would definately be like a can of sardine.

For the past 1 week, it has been a stressful & filled with disappointments. It is a long story... I am sick of thinking back what had happened back then... I've been feeling very dull and negative since then.. Even in my dreams.. it wasn't any good dreams.. I dreamt of my procedures, tutors giving pressure n my family.
I just can't run from reality.. I'm just so sick with my life here.

I''m so tired of anything after a tough day n I'm feeling kinda dull now...

No matter how much hard work i put in, nobody appreciates it..
No matter how much I care, I do not get it in return..
No matter how much I worry, it was actually worthless..
No matter how much I wish, my wishes will never come true..
No matter how much time I have, it always ended up wasted..

STRESS TIRED HUNGRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

STRESS
I couldn't fulfill my procedures.. been working like mad without gaining anything.

TIRED
I didnt get enough sleep for almost a week...Now, I really had panda eyes. I've been running around the whole hospital for 9 HOURS!!!!

HUNGRY
I ate 1/2 of sausage bread at 6.20am & my next meal is at 4.30pm.. I were extremely dehidrated n hungry...

HAPPY CNY~!!

Gong Xi Fa Chai~!!
This year CNY kinda similiar to last year... eat sleep eat sleep..
I received a bad news before the CNY.. which my 2 baby hamsters being attacked and they went missing >_< I miss them so much... anyway.. i has been replaced with 2 new hamsters,, I still like the previous batch coz it is special... =(

Red

After a week +, the colour of my hair had changed more to red.... >_<
Its ok.. coz I still like the colour,,, =)

Purple + Red

I'm broke~!! ><
Since CNY is coming soon.. so I used up my allowance to buy new clothings n went to saloon to dye my hair ~
Guess wat.. my hair now is Purplish Red~! woohoo~!
my camera KO ..therefore i cant take any pics to show ... hehehee...

I wanted to buy new cellphone with camera.. but no more okane$$$... but somehow i thought of keeping the money to adopt more turtles~! =D

Daily Dressing

*sob sob*
I have to go for daily dressing in the hospital on my right arm.
That day there's just a small absess that i thought when it pops then it will cure by itself.. but somehow it came back again & the absess were bigger! During a lecture today, the absess came out !! >_< After my lecture over, I went to hospital to see a doctor & she ordered to daily dressing n take some antibiotics.. haih.. its just a small lubang only nia.. but yet still need to come for dressing..

Happy Year 2008~!

Year by year just past so FAST~!! hayai desu ne...
Hope that this year everything will move smoothly ... not like last year...
Do u guys have a New Year Resolution?
Actually I do have.. but I'll try my best to change to be a POSITIVE THINKING person~!!
Hope that u guys would help me with this.. =)